Taboo

Thanks for the welcome back wishes and mazal tovs.

Before I got married, I thought I knew it all. Rules, halachos, I didnt expect to learn anything new. Well, I was unpleasantly surprised.

Once married, you enter an entire world that is based around halacha. Never in my life did I know when shkia was besides for on a friday, for shabbos. I thought it was a man's job to know. Not so. I never thought that keeping halacha could be so hard or so embarrassing.

Not to scare the single ones off from getting married. Being married is truly wonderful, most of the time. But there is something in not having to worry about getting home at a certain time, and there is definitely less stress about it. I told one of my good single friends to just enjoy her time without worrying that you are doing something wrong.

I know that this subject is basically taboo to discuss. But I dont think I am talking explicitly here, and it is on my mind. Am I the only one that really has a hard time?

Hello there

So yes.. it has been awhile. Im guessing you guessed it, but BH- bchasdei hashem- we were blessed with an adorable, healthy baby girl. So whilst I was getting back to myself and learning how to care for a little being- I got a little busy. Then settling back into our apartment and Israel.... I just left the blog on the back burner. But Ive been lurking.

Remember my posts of last year? Im sure you do. It was how envious I was- how unsure. And I know that many people would like to ask me- now that I have my beautiful little girl- am I sorry that I worried? And I dont think so. You see- its the crystal ball phenomenon. If we knew yes, and when- we would enjoy the waiting time. If we knew that on January 9 2010 we would get engaged- then why worry for the 2 years preceding? But we dont know. So we do worry.

2 of my single friends have just become Kallahs. My other married friend of the "group" complained that the girls didnt tell her they were dating- which if she and I didnt do back then... we wouldve gotten stares and silences. But alas- they may feel slighted. We are both married well over a year, with babies of our own. They often complain about us, I am sure. She was saying that now that they are getting married- they will understand. Understand why she cant pick up at 8 pm and drop her baby and husband who comes home from work at 7:30 to go "hang out" in NYC once a week. Why sometimes she has to miss things- vorts, possibly even weddings.

Once again- I do see both views. The single ones feel like they lost us. Which in a way, they have. But it isnt our fault. And we married ones wait for our phone calls as well. Maybe they got shy suddenly, when one of us has a husband, or a child... but still. Friendship has to be a two way street.