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Monday, February 9, 2009

Who knew?

So... I was having a chat with a fellow married friend, living back home. We were weighing the pros and cons of living in Israel, staying close to family, or moving further away but staying in the US. And it really got me thinking.

Of course, living in Eretz Yisroel is a privilege. I know that. There are many times that I look out my window and see the beauty... am able to just hop into a cab and be at the Kosel, etc. Besides. Everyone here is married. There is none of the pressure of keeping with married/single friends, because everyone here is the same. No one here gives me eyebrows when I have to go home to make supper. And everyone is basically on the same schedule. Another plus is shabbos. There are always guests to be had, whether yeshiva bachurim, seminary girls, or couples. We are often invited out and shabbos is a time where we can either be alone, or bond with others. And, being married six or so months... it has turned me into quite a cook. But I miss America. My family. My friends... less responsibilities.

My friend got married a few weeks after me. She lives in close proximity to her parents and married siblings, as well as all of our friends. She complains all the time, that the friends don't ever call her, invite her, etc. I tried telling her that sometimes married friends are intimidating, and they may just not want to bother her. All of her married friends do not live near her.... so she feels like the odd one out, being married. Our friends get to go to Florida and pizza, and she is the one that feels bad for having to make supper. It really turns the tables, no? Another point of hers is that out of all the shabbosim and yomim tovim that shes been married, she's made one shabbos. She asked me after five months of marriage how to make chicken. I think I swallowed my laughter... but it didn't really give them a chance to be themselves.

So here I am... missing home like crazy. Missing my friends, my family, my car, etc. I know E'Y is beautiful, but when you are here it can be really difficult. I cant wait for Pesach vacation and the ability to be home, with my parents... less responsibilities. But Im guessing that living like that, right away, is probably not the best thing. Israel probably is.

17 comments:

halfshared said...

I think the inviting and hanging out with friends is more common in Israel than here. People are generally more busy here because they usually work, whereas in Israel, many don't. Also, you NEED your friends more there because you usually don't have family to lean on.
I understand you though because it must be really hard living so far from everyone. You are really great for sticking it out even if sometimes you don't feel like it. I hope the time passes really fast and before you know it, you'll be here in America!

nmf #7 said...

Agreed with Halfshared- the extra free time in Israel makes for more socializing, and sometimes more boredom.
Wishing you that the rest of your Yishuv time should go easily!

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